Every one's story is so unique, so here is mine.
My name is Michelle, I am 21 years old.
About five years ago, I began to feel an annoying dull pain near my ankle. Everyone thought I was faking it to get out of high school PE which I did kind of fake at times :p
Anyway, being who I am, I wanted to know what it was. So I went to my pediatrician and told him what I felt. Like any other unknowledgeable doctor I was about to see, I got a "tendinitis" "unknown" "normal". About ten doctors to be exact actually. The pain increased and was sooo painful to the lightest tough.
Finally doctor #11 (an orthopedic surgeon) decided to do an MRI again (after I'd done one two years prior which was "normal").
And there it was, that nasty white dot that had caused me such excruciating pain for the past 4 years.
The doctor was very relaxed and had no doubt that this tumor was benign. We scheduled to have it taken out because it was very painful to me.
In September, I had the tumor removed and in October I received the more horrific call of my life.
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I explain my full story on my blog if you'd like more details - https://michellevscancer.wordpress.com
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Fast forwarding. I went to be seen by my first oncologist. And frankly, I think she ruined my entire perspective of that medical institution. She was cold, to the point, and laid it out like it was. I believe the first thing she did was starting spitting questions at me like she had no time and was in and out of there in 10 mins. During the two meetings I was with her, she mentioned chemo (not her field), radiation(not her field), and amputation which was her top choice (her field). I thought the idea was absolutely absurd. Having little to no knowledge I now see why people do it, but I still do not think this is an option for me.
I was scanned immediately after my first meeting with this doctor. My results came back perfect, there was no sign of metastasis. Yet she still seemed very pessimistic.
I was then referred to several oncologists which is where I saw a new personality from each one. The surgical oncologist thought amputation was absurd as well, and didn't even want to do a biopsy of my lymph nodes like the first doctor wanted.
I saw a radiation oncologist that made me feel like I was going to drop dead if I didn't do radiation..Yet the burns may be so severe I might not be able to walk anyway..
At this point I had practically made up my mind that I wasn't going to agree to any of this treatment that seemed to have worse side affects than what its treating. I am a strong believer in natural medicine and the power of the body and immune system. So I declined it all.
Now I'm stuck. I have made up my mind about treatment but I haven't been able to deal with my anxiety that it may have come back or its spreading. Its so bad to the point where my only remedy is cannabis and ignoring that I am 2 months late for my scan.
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I guess I'm seeking information on how any of you cope with the anxiety? I can't believe how long this disease can stay in remission then reoccur. So I can't imagine living in fear for the next 10 years.
And have any of you had it never come back after using hollistic methods? or nothing at all?
Thanks!
-Michelle